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New years @ NYC   
04:06pm 03/01/2004
  Brian Johnson of ACDC pretty up sums up the events of the past few days...

All you women who want a man of the street
But you don't know which way you wanna turn
Just keep a coming and put your hand out to me
'Cause I'm the one who's gonna make you burn

I'm gonna take you down - down, down, down
So don't you fool around
I'm gonna pull it, pull it, pull the trigger

Shoot to thrill, play to kill
Too many women with too many pills, yeah
Shoot to thrill, play to kill
I got my gun at the ready, gonna fire at will

(it all means nothing without the music)
Heres to Luxury apartmetments on Wall St.
Sleep sleep.   
12:43am 25/03/2003
  I attempt to get around the transpatent satisfaction of material wealth by spreading out the joy. I either continually buy small satisfying items, or regularly make gigantic purchases that tide me over for a few good months.
This time around I bought a Tempurpedic Mattress which incorporates amazing,european,viscoelastic,nasa approved,adjective, adverb adjective, adjective, technology.

shave your chest

Appatently, according to the website, the mattresses are created by harvesting the hormones of a thousand vestral virgins at the peak of orgasm while on exstacy. This product is then impregnated into the core of the mattess which seeps into the bloodstream of the user via the skin. Sweet sleep.
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home depot   
04:35pm 23/03/2003
  Too busy whining to remember the Home Depot incident. As I was pulling into Home Depot to buy some paint for a redneck project had, a chevy blazer and a cavalier crashed beautifully a couple of feet in fornt of me. Now that I think about it, the more I don't want to tell the story. But in the end I hung around a while (apparently as an EMT I have a legal obligation) and dealed around a bit and tried to buy the totaled cavalier. yehaw. FSU  
I havent slept in 26 hours.excision   
01:04am 23/03/2003
  This jet lag is making me sound overly reflective.
Im absolutely dreading the next few weeks. My graduate shcool is now tentatively paid for. It is an interesting experince asking the old money matriarch of your family for $200k. Luckily it panned out well over some tea and sliced apples. Exams are drawing closer and I've had an absolute shit semester. Buckling down for them and compensating in an act of academic heroism wouldn't be so much of a problem if I didn't have so much shit to pan though that Ive brought upon myself. Everyone has their baggage that they carry around with them and eventually work through. My problem is that I tend to push the threshold of how much of it I can carry around before deciding to deal with it.
A lot of it stems from pre-college history. Moving around continually required me to learn to briefly rely on shifty alliances, and then burn bridges like matches. The problem in this is that in any semi-permanent situation, shit begins to accumulate and there is an eventual backlash of feeling and emotion and poopoo that you previously never needed to deal with.
I wish I was just feeling sorry for myself. Im more pissed that this stuff seems to be an ineveitable secondary consequence of the human condition. How efficient we could be if we could just excise these and other things like sleep and sex!
Here is a light, but rather practical demonstration:

I come back from Korea and check my voicemail. The first few are some random friends from around the country. The second is Hunter informing me that he has placed an add in the paper to sell his jeep. Fair enough. He then tells me that the keys are left for me at some location. Ok,cool. I am then informed that it is my cell phone number he has placed in the add. GOD DAMN YOU, HUNTER.
If I needed random rednecks heckling me over the phone I would set up a weight loss pyramid scheme or stick up "work at home" posters. The sale of the jeep is resultant of the most recent of a littany of financial fiascos that Hunter has brought upon himself for the sake of...well, what the fuck does he have to show for it?
Had he taken even the mose conservative of measures that has been suggested to him by numerous individuals on countless occassions, he would at least be sustainable.
This is not someting I want to deal with (again) at cusp of the exam shedule. If only I could excise this chunk of events from my life by shooting Hunter in the face. How efficient!
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i come from the future...and hip hop culture still lives.   
04:25pm 21/03/2003
  So Ive been in Korea for the last six days and its time to go home. It took about five and a half days for me to make the perception shift to think of Seoul as a huge disgusting metropolis full of bleary eyed math geniuses to thinking of it as my old home. Given the events of the past couple of years, I suppose "home" is a term that was always taken with a grain of salt; relative only to the amount of time I spent resting or eating at a centrailized location.
Seoul was the place where everything began. This place is almost immeasurable. Its like five or six Manhattans nesteled inside of LA. There is a constant bubble of smog enveloping the city, and the distributuion of wealth is wacky (more on this later). There are more people riding the subways at rushour than there are inhabitants of entire US states. And there is ALWAYS something to do. A lot of people suppose that goes without saying for most major cities, but you can walk out your front door here at 4 in the morning and find something engaging to do immediately. Even in NYC you have to search around a bit.
Like most places, written description does the city little justice. There are more critical constituents than just sheer enormity. I feel lucky to have moved carrying with me more than most others in this position would have.
01:42pm 19/02/2003
  If there is one experience I detest more than anything in the world, its almost dying. It wouldn't bother me quite as much were my death a direct result of situations I put myself into (a statement that will be keenly rehashed in the next following months of war), but for instance, were I sleeping peacefully, and some asshole shot me in the head indiscriminately...MAN would I be pissed.

Today I was crossing the street, even opting to take the safe route and waiting for the light to change. Putting elementary schooling to good use, before I crossed I looked left, right, then left again to watch for incoming traffic. All good. So I'm halfway across the street nerdedly thinking about DNA antisense technology when I see a Ford Bronco II headed directly at me. He was turning in from a connecting street so by the time I saw him he was only about 7 feet away. Only after I had dodged did he swerve to avoid me.
Up to this point this event is no different than if any one of you fat fucks were almost hit while attempting to walk off that extra 30 pounds of "baby fat" you've been carrying around for the past 18 or so years.
But,I landed from my dodge in a crouched position where my knees were very bent and my body was close to the ground. IMMEDIATELY after I realized I hadn't been hit, before I even recovered from my crouching position, the first impulse that entered my brain was the need for retribution. Nanoseconds after I had landed from the dodge I was already scanning the ground for rocks or anything good and dense to throw at the car.
I couldn't find any , so I stood up and simply yelled "WHAT THE FUCK! GOD DAMN!" through his open window.
Needless to say, I don't feel any better.
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Bell Curve   
08:57am 12/02/2003
  I've had slow semesters before, but DAMN I'm having a slow semester this spring. I was even kicked out of a class (didn't have prereqs). Today was the last time I could mess up on a grade and still recieve an A in all my classes. I just hate starting out behind so early. It makes me sad to see my first test grades fall firmly in to the middle of the class average. I guess this is what it feels like to be white.  
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I hate fat people.   
09:31pm 30/01/2003
  Only in on livejournal now to be an ass. I'm too damn busy during classes to vent, so at the end of the day this is going to be a practical substitute to slashing tires.
I Hate fat people.

I've started a new project. Here is how it transpires:

1) stop eating
2) take diet pills
3) sleep less
4) study more

These four tenets fulfill the four following objectives:

1) get skinny
2) get skinnier
3) get skinnier still
4) learn more words to spite fat people

I HATE fat people. They drive big cars to accommodate their proportions, precluding the option to walk. They eat to fill their emotional voids, making them fatter, deepening the void. They steal my internships to get money that will ultimately be spent on food.

Ideally, fat people should:

b) Satisfy the demands of a chubby psyche through community service. They aren't doing anything anyway.

I hate, Hate, HATE fat people. If you're reading this saying "amen, brother!" this animosity does not apply to you.
If you're reading this and adjusting your personal criteria for an "healthy weight", then you're fucking fat. You are the reason the world hates America.
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East side.   
03:50am 23/12/2002
  So the real East coast people I know and love outside of family, and outside this fucking Livejournal breaks down as follows:

Another person who shares the mutual desire to forever keep in touch through sporadic, but intense bursts of friendship. The daughter of a recently divorced rock and roll seamsteress (tiny dancer) and a tech for some famous country band. Prior to greg, she was the primary source of free tickets and backstage passes. Currently (aka forever) in the long process of moving to her insanely rich Uncle's flat in the heart of Greenwich Village. Score. I hate her boyfriend. Her uncle bears an uncanny resmblance to Benjamin Franklin (he does History Channel documantaries), smokes pot ,and lives in a castle. Her favorite color is brown.

Only daughter to the BILLIONARE CEO of Brother Corporation, she stands as heiress to the entire company. Apparently during the beginning of high school back in Korea, I implanted some sort of rouge business ideology into her and now she refuses to take the role and is passing the fourtune down to her cousins (ok, ok, not entirely by my hand, but not entirely excluded).I accidentally set her high school on fire. She is at NYU where she doing the business thing in attempts to spread her own little evil empire. We have this pissy relation thing going, but it never gets in the way of talking like we were kids again. She has a nice Tiwaneese boyfriend, and given some of the nasty shit that has happened to her over the past 2 years, its a good thing.

Son of missionaries I met in Korea. Now somewhere in Pensecola or the surronding area programming software. Even though he is a shit, I owe everything to him. He taught me to think like I didn't give a fuck and I taught him how to live like it. He was there when I first ran with the punk rawk thing. Some of the best times of my life. After coming to the states, the hair was till green, you could still make noise, you could even go to a show or two but it wasn't the same. bleh. Sweet nostalgia. I think he has a dog.

Perhaps not the best decision maker,but at least he fucks up with gusto. He blew a 20k trust fund on Italian suits and shoes, a SUV, and gas money to move to San Diego. He subsequently sold most of it to buy a plane ticket back to Nashville. Currently working at Hog Heaven (BBQ not Harleys).

Past frinds I wish made the list, but Im too big an asshole to have consistently returned their calls and emails over the past few years:

Jennifer B. (NYC, Fordham? )
Sam S. (NYC, Columbia)
Chong [real name I swear (VA)]
Andy D. (Harvard)
Matt D. (Netherlands)
Susan H. (Beijing)
David K. (Stanford)
Jane K. (Tokyo)
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03:36am 23/12/2002
  Haven't been to LiveJournal in a long time.

A's in my classes
EMT liscence
NEW jeep (in process of transformation as you read)
This one is finally a respectable vehicle, and on top of that, its highway (and obviously offroad) worthy, so I'm off to the West coast as soon as I get the chance.

Still on vacation and I haven't had the opportunity to sleep more than 5 hours a night. FYooooKin busy me.

Being Asian, I have more leeway in the use of the word "nigger" than the rest of you Honkeys out there. Take an example a few weeks ago. I was taking a walk around the ghettoier part of Ft. Sanders at 3 in the morning, when I was approached by some random stinky black guy [(SBG) none of the preceeding adjectives are innherntly related].

SBG: Yo.
Me: Sup?
SBG: Got some cash to spare?
Me: Nigger, If I had cash to spare, I'd be driving a car.
I gave him a light instead.
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Go fish   
07:15pm 22/11/2002
  So there is this great game I inadvertently invented. This is how you play:

1)While your girlfriend is out of town, let her pet bunny ,Elliot G. Bunny
,run and dance and play freely around the apartment.
(make sure it is late in the afternoon as to make the dimly lit apartment even darker, and be sure the bunny is dark in color)

2)Play videogames for a couple of hours while you should be studying/running/thinking about evil people trying to send you to England.

3)Get up in now extremely dark apartment and stumble around in preparation for a nap.

4) Accidentally step on bunny.

5) Curse loudly in surprise and step on bunny again.

6) Chase now terrified bunny in huge swooping circles around the apartment yelling "Sorry bunny! Sorry Bunny! Sorry Bunny!"

7) Attempt to appease bunny with slices of fresh fruit and gentle head petting.

8) Vow never to allow girlfriend to learn of above game.
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damn you testosterone.   
04:00am 17/11/2002
  Today you ask?

1) Wrecked my truck into a tree (knocked down the tree)
2) 10 minutes later, wrecked into an embankment (it won)
3) 6 hours later went to a party and left with a black eye, swollen ear, and bloody rugburn

calling Jackie.
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Cuz you ain't like those NIGGERS!   
07:41pm 09/11/2002
  Call 1, Female MVA:
***Arrive on the scene (aos) of a motor vehicle accident (mva) where a 49 year old (y.o.) woman had rear ended a sedan and then sideswiped an SUV at a redlight. Firefighters (KFD) and police (KPD) already on scene with cervical collar immobilizing patients spine (c-spine), seated in the drivers seat of car. Chief complaint (cc) of generalized neck and back pain, and severe pain of the left ankle. Airway uncompromised, screaming/moaning. Normal level of conciousness (loc). Blood pressure (bp) 120/80. Pulse 67 beats per minute {bpm}***

Sounds pretty bad huh? That's what I thought at first, till we saw the perscription bottle sitting on her lap. We pulled her from the car and the entire way there she screamed and moaned and pleaded that we give her something to put her down. Classic drug seeking behavior of:

1) Imediately requesting specific narcotics
2) Asking for narcotics before stating chief complaints
3) God damn bottle of Vicodin sitting in her lap

Among other things she had taken were Oxycotin and Demoral in conjunction with anti-seizure meds, which she had a history of. Another thing, if you have a broken ankle and are shaken to the point of wailing, your body's sympathetic adrenal system will automaticaly kick in and boost your heart rate. Her 67 bpm in this situation would suggest that either she has the bodily control of a tsaoist master, or that the drugs she recently took makes Courtney Love look like a glue sniffer.
FYI the SUV she sideswiped was being driven by a trauma surgeon at the hospital she was being transported to.Go figure.

Call 3. Male chest pain. "Frequent Flyer"
***aos of large 28 y.o. male. Pt. lying supine on mattress with 90% empty plastic jug of vodka and several empty cans of natural light beer in his immediate area. Patient exclaimed "oh yeah, i am drunk. Leave me alone so I can die!" CC of intense chest pain secondary to excessive alcohol (etoh) consumption and cardiac history. Wife called system, pt. refuses care. Bp 190/100. Pulse thick and bounding. Pt. reports of taking moderate dose of verapamil. Wight: 375 lbs***

This call got real crazy real quick.
Let me first explain the residence. It was
an old (once lavely) 1940-50s farmhouse that had gone to complete shit. The yard was strewn with classic cars that , despite their coats of grey primer, were rapidly rusting away. The house itself had a heafty dose of decay as well; doors made out of tattered blankets, makeshift woodburning stove ramshambly hacked into a brick wall, stale jugs of milk covering the kitchen tabele, the works. The entire place smelled of piss. Thick, stale stagnant piss.
The most stiking feature of the interior, other than the piss smell, was the abundance of Jesus memorabilia. Jesus prints, Jesus shirts, Jesus coozies, Jesus knit kleenex box covers, a can of Jesus malt soda... this shit was EVERYWHERE. On the walls, on the floor, laying in the ash of the stove...
The Pt. was initially supine so his back was exposed. There were a few very large, faded, poorly done tattoos of a fairy, a garden gnome, and an "interpurtation" of the night sky. My preceptor initially addressed the Pt. as "Preacher". This is when things got nutso.
Pt. began to weep over an incident earlier in the day involving his 7 y.o. son. He eventually rolled over to speak to us, an in doing so, exposed an extremely large tattoo of the face of (you guessed it) Jesus on his abdomen.
Despite his refusal of care,his initial comments were sufficient to classify him as a psych patient. Plus, his bp was so high that he would have stroked without treatment. Some social intervention was attempted , but Pt. became increasingly agitated at our insistance. He downed another beer in defiance of our presence. His wife began to to plead with him to go to the hospital. He then basically flipped out and began screaming things and cussing at her about how she can have all the cars if she leaves him forever. The bizzare thing to me at the time was that he used bible verses in his verbal assult, but he quoted the verses verbatim, rather than just using some generalized biblical anecdote. At this time the Pt's equally large brother arrived to attempt to convince him to go. All the family members began to yell at one another. Thinking that being in a room with three pissed off people, whose collective weight was over 1000 pounds, was a bad thing...I began to scan the room for something that I could use as a weapon, but the only things close to me were a ziplock bag of crusty cheese curls and a Jesus plaque.
Luckily my preceptor caught my attention by statring me in the eyes and pointedly commanding "You, go!" and ordered me back towards the ambulance. So I waited there in the back of the truck for about an hour, waiting for gunshots or the like. In the end, the Pt. agreed to go. we strapped him in a stretcher, and headed out. At this point he was still pissy drunk and his speech was heavily slurred
(Pt. dialouge roughly translated)
Pt: You know Dr. Lou!?
Me: Umm, no.
Preceptor (shoots glance at me): Sure he knows Dr. Lou
Me: OH, Dr. Lou! Yeah, old family friend.
Pt: gawwdamm if he ain't a damn fine heart doctor! Ain't he !?
Me: Yessir, one of the best.
Pt: You Japaneese!?
Me: Yessir
(at this point I lay his hand in my lap to take some vitals {170/85})
Pt: Now ah aint' no fag or nothin!
Me: Ok, no problem
Pt: grmllgrffkahvoooo
Me: Yessir
Pt: Yeah, I think of Dr. Lou as all Ameican. He's as Japaneese as hell, but he aint no nigger or Jew, you know!? You guys make the smartest!
Me: Yessir, thank you.

We eventually make it to the hospital after a couple of more minutes of incoherence. he peed on my hands a little (I had gloves on) As you've probably surmised, hes a "fallen" southern preacher. I need to eat some gifelte fish.

call 5. Male inter-facility transport:
***55 y.o. male. Bp 0/0. Pules 0 bpm. Breath sounds absent. No respirations***

This one was pretty easy, becasue as you've probably figured out, the guy was already dead and in a bag. The cool thing was that we got to take him to the facility associated with UT's infamous Body Farm. We couldn't dock in the bay because it had some evidence in it, so we wheeled him in. Needless to say the place reeked of rotting bodies...

call 7. Dialysis transport. Male:
***aos of residence. Transport male to dialysis center. BP unreadable. Pulse thin and thready***

While this one wasn't that all exciting, it was one that I feel is worth mentioning. The neighborhood was one of those subdivisions that had been a development project that popped up within the past 5-10 years. The residence itself was one of those huge houses that , while worth quite a bit on paper, was just a thrown together floor plan that is fed to those who suddenly find themselves in a higher income tax bracket.
We walked in and my preceptor had to explain to the elderly wife that I was a student and that I was a necessary part of the crew (She was conspicuously suspicious of my presence, and continually stared at my hands).
Surprisingly, it was the wife that made me feel the shittiest.
Imagine a woman who gets up at 5am every morning to make a pot of of oatmeal even though she only needs a bowls worth (strangely he didn't notice when last week she forgot the pinch of cinnamon he loves). Having no real hobbies or entertainment in such an elitist neighborhood, she stays with her husband all morning reading the paper to him, taking him to the bathroom between the editorials and the world events, which he really doens't care much for anyway. Silently dreading the day when she'll have to sell the $40k truck sitting in the smooth uncracked asphalt driveway, she throws away the classifieds before she reads to him, explaining that they are missing because she was clipping coupons again. It isn't much, but its really the only thing they can do after last month, when he lost the ability to take walks around the block in this nieighborhood that they could have never afforded without that promotion back in 76'. As we take him to get his blood cleaned out , she patiently waits at the kitchen table with a cup of coffe. She looks up with each car that passed down the road, gazing through the double pane windows that salesman once said would pay for themselves...

This is the dumb ass melodrama that boils in in your head after 12 hours of chasing drunks and junkies.
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feed me   
09:12am 09/11/2002
  JUST finished a 14 hour clinical tonight for my EMT class. 7pm-9am. Excellence in a Friday night. This is just a brief recap, I'll elaborate when I get ome sleep:

Call 1 - MVA perscription seeker
call 2 - Transport big guy
call 3 - Reverend wants to die
call 4 - Girl w/breakdown
call 5 - dead guy.... (BODY FARM!)
call 6 - stroke
call 7 - dialysis transport

Ass covering disclaimer:
Anything I write in the future about clinicals is strictly fictional and in no way reflects actual events, occurances, or people that I have encountered in the EMS system. And in the coincidental chance they are slightly representative, the names have been changed to protect them.

sweet sleep, come to me...
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My neck is red.   
12:48am 07/11/2002
  more drivel.

Anyone outside of TN reading this needs to fully comprehend the magnitude of the boredom that I face on a continual basis. I live in Tennessee. Tennesee.Tenn. TN.
The only thing that keeps me together at times is the hope that the wacko academia I'm in pursuit of will lead to bigger and better things/places...again. The rest of the time I subject myself to offensive homogonization. That is, homogonization that offends other people.
In addition to periodic impulsiveness that I exhibit at times, weekend projects result in the development of a thick southern drawl and the following pictures:

Looks like it tears ass just sittin' in the parkin lot!

Me ponderin' on how many times I have to go to the plasma bank to finance this baby...

Hell Yeah! Is that Skynard? Turn that shit up!!

Truthfully, I'm rather pleased that this slip into the trailer park kept me occupied till the wee hours of the morning. The immediate downside is that EVERY stoplight has turned into a goddamned scene out of American Graffiti.
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I am a poor boy, from a poor family.   
11:02pm 28/10/2002
note:read my user bio before looking at my art

Those of you who have been by the house have seen the gigantic chalkboard we salvaged from the school dumpster across the street. As people drop in or we have the inclination to do so, the board slowly gets filled with a large chalky mural consisting of drug induced depictions of the animals or evidence of Ben's latent man lust.
The board recently underwent one of it's periodic cleanings, and Jenny told me to put something up. Stepping up to the wall, I saw indications that Allison had already set the initial tone of the mural as can be seen in the following pictures:

Because of numerous reasons, one being that I have to LOOK at that board every time I come home, I decided that I would pull a Rumsfeld and take quick and decisive action...Collapse )
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no exceptions   
01:02am 24/10/2002
  I hate ALL OF YOU in your own special little (and not so little) ways.  
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PROOF that I need more sleep.   
11:24pm 15/10/2002

soupermary: and I don't think you should make out with boys

AfterThisNap: If sucking face with a couple of guys can get me outta TN and in the Bay Area sooner, then call me Richard Simmons.

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Fuck Warren G Harding. I need to brush up on my paralell parking   
04:22pm 13/10/2002
  In the attempt to separate LJ people from ummmm, real people, I categorized everyone geographically.

My significant west coast connections break down to:

1) Greg.
Music industry kid who splits his free time between LA and Tokyo. Currently residing in Tempe Arizona where he is getting the fastest degree possible so his dad's company has a legitimate reason to give him millions a year. I love this guy. Thanks for all the tickets. His mom is so hot; I asked her to prom.

Shit, I promised to call you back...last week.

3) Mary/Jer.
or more appropriately:

3) Mary.
Sweet girl from Louisiana who struck a scholarship to Pepperdine in Malibu, CA. Splitting her time between a solid education and the pursuit of a commercial acting career. Current resume' hilights include being a faggy White Stripes dancer at the MTV music awards and a keyboardist for a band that opens for Weezer. Currently residing in Santa Monica. She has fun. We've known each other since my hair was green (16?) and it has been fun to egg on each others respective career/life paths on. Now the ex-girlfriend of...

4) Jer.
Originally from LA, Jer spent about a year of his life in the southeastern US chasing Mary and a career like Greg's. He was on Wheel of Fortune. Once when he was all torn up over a girl (pre-mary) I told him to start a fire as a simple act of destruction to soothe his mind (we were young). This nutty bastard took five big-gulps full of gasoline and created a 30 foot pillar of flame out of the most prominent old Oak in a public park (the tree was fine, but somewhat darker). On top of having the gall to set large fires ,he had the charm and charisma to convince my friend-hating mom to let him stay at our old house in Nashville for two weeks.

Jer isn't doing too well anymore. His parents, baptist preachers or something of the like, decided after intense praying that ECT (ElectroConvulsiveTherapy) would cure Jer of his occasional bouts with depression. So after a couple of weeks of Bilateral brain juicing, Jer is quite literally a shell of his former self. He can't remember shit short term and his long term memory has been substantially fragmented.
This has resulted in general confusion and irritation, and has caused him to be somewhat of a recluse. As he so succinctly put it, "Im retarded and friendless, but I'm catching up on my Jenny Jones."
So I'm driving to LA soon just to sit and watch daytime talk shows for a few days with the same guy who climbed up and humped the 20 foot dinosaur in Gatlinburg in front of a procession of police. This is probably going to end up with a nasty argument with his parents about the practical imiscibility between religion and medicine, but it's not like I have something to lose anymore, and I can't take that much Jenny Jones.
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Job safety   
01:19am 27/09/2002
  Holy shit. His ARM!  
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